My Husband said this weekend.... "I'm sick of being sick." This weekend he came down with something... Who knows if it was what I had or something different. I just know he felt bad enough to miss work which almost never happens. I wore my happy pants all day Saturday but I must have forgotten and put them in the laundry Saturday night because this morning I woke up with that terrible blue feeling... Not the overwhelming sadness I had last year, just an achy sadness in the pit of my chest. After my pity fest in the bubble bath (what a great place to cry your heart out to God), I put my big girl panties on and kept the demons at bay for most of the day.When I get to heaven, after the rejoicing has taken place and everyone has settled down, I'd really like to ask God just a few simple questions... You know during the question and answer portion of eternity that's scheduled sometime right after the praise and worship service.Why women were born with so many dadgum emotions? A woman's emotions are a lot like the weather in Oklahoma.... Probably one of the few states where you can experience every season all in one day and sometimes all in the same day. Thanks to the abundance of raging hormones God gave women,or at least this woman, I can, and have, routinely experienced every human emotion and sometimes done so within minutes of each other. Thankfully it doesn't happen all the time, but I really hate it each time it does happen. Some of the things I beat myself up over today.....
A) I'm not as good a friend to people as I once was
B) I should have handled last year better
C) I must be a bad person because I can't fix other people's
people's problems
D) I felt guilty because my husband was sick (I'm sure I made him that way) and I was getting over being sick so I
skipped church
E) I was angry at the medical profession because there are still
illnesses they don't know how to cure that I feel should have
been cured long ago (Can I hear an Amen Sista?)
F) A friend who has had breast cancer is going through yet
another surgery and I am unable to "stand in" for her so
she won't have to go through it
G) A little patient on Grey's Anatomy had to break up with his
long time girlfriend in order to receive his long awaited
lung transplant
The good news is... Apparently I didn't have enough to worry about today so my mind created all kinds of junk to moan about. Could be worse, this day could have lasted forever like it did last year, but thank God it didn't.
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