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Friday, October 30, 2015

Good in a Scary Kind of Way


Although I grew up watching horror movies with my friends, I've never been a huge haunted house person. Maybe it's because I live in my very own "Herman Munster" house so it's just another day in the neighborhood for me. Barbara, on the other hand has wanted to go to a haunted house for years, so I told her I would take her to The Sanctuary in Oklahoma City.  I picked her up after work and to be honest I was dreading it a little. Driving to the City after working all day, and waiting in line so someone could scare  me, sounded like a long day at the end of a long week. I realized that kind of attitude makes me sound like a boring old person which I refuse to be, so I decided to take a walk on the wild side. As we waited in line for the doors to open, Barbara pointed around and said...... "tennis shoes, tennis shoes, tennis shoes" Then pointed at me and said.... "Stripper Heels! Jac, why would you wear heels to a haunted house?  You're going to kill yourself crazy lady." Trust me on this.... If you can't do something in 5 inch heels, then it's probably not worth doing in the first place. I assured her she needn't worry about my ability to escape potential danger due to my footwear. If needed, I am perfectly able to mow you over in my stripper heels just as easily as I can in my running
shoes... This wasn't my first rodeo. We hadn't made it into the actual haunted part before she began to crouch behind me tugging on the waist of my jeans and clutching the back of my shirt. She had worked herself into a terrified state before we saw anything scary. When we finally made it to the scary part, there was a lot of screaming, running, and crouching. She was determined to crouch behind me until something jumped out, then she would scream, (which caused me to scream), run to safety, then wait while I moseyed through seeing what I could see. Sometimes she would run from something scary only to find herself running into something more scary. I laughed and laughed watching her crouch and scream. I encouraged her..... "Barbara, slow down, enjoy the moment..... Act back to the actors." But she would have none of that. The sanctuary does an excellent job. They put a lot of work into making you see, hear, and smell fear. The headless doll room was very creepy and the lady in labor gave me a good start.. At the end of the night we came out with big smiles and scratchy throats from the laughing and screaming. She got to check another thing off of her bucket list so, it was good in a scary kind of way.

Monday, October 26, 2015

Word of the Day.... Fingerprintless

It's not a good day when you are in the middle of styling your hair when your flat iron decides to go out. That's what happened to me this weekend. While we were in the City, I ran by Ulta to pick up a replacement. Let me say.... They do not give those things away. But anything that is designed to make you look better than you were born to be, is always worth the price. After looking at a plethora of brands, sizes, and styles, I came across a 3 in 1 Flat iron/curling wand. The ceramic plates of the gadget are "infused with nourishing Black Seed Oil" which is supposed to give your hair "Incredible Shine" Now I stood right there in the aisle and said to myself.... "That's just a bunch of crap.... Even if it's true, I'm 99% sure it would have no affect on how shiny your hair is, but I liked the box (yes I am that shallow) and the other selling point was.....  Wait for it, wait for it..... It was a Kardashian 3 in 1. Looking back on the purchase, that was probably the main reason NOT to buy it but buy it I did. I don't even know who or what the heck those people are famous for except maybe for taking an incessant amount of inappropriate selfies which is just so..... Narcissistic. But, let's go back to the box.... I really liked the packaging. The second clue that I should not have bought this particular flat/curling iron was, it came with a thermal glove. Anyone who knows me..... Knows that I should not be using anything that requires a thermal glove or any other protective wear.... That should have been a big red flag. The good thing is the new flat iron/curling iron gets really hot. So hot in fact, it will burn your fingerprints right off your fingers if you try to use it without the "Thermal Glove" (which I highly do not recommend doing). On the bright side of things..... If I decide to take up cat burglary during the learning curve of using my new gadget, I won't have to worry about leaving behind any fingerprints. Yea... No, I am completely serious and am presently fingerprintless (if that's even a word). If it's not, it totally should be.

Happy First Birthday Levi Atlas Patterson