The Secret

There's a hole in myself that just won't mend
A longing beyond my control
It's captured my soul and pierced my heart
like arrows from a bow
The pain it induces is mixed with joy
in an indescribable way
my emotions are scattered with fear and delight
For something I cannot say
The forbidden is tempting to say the least
and beckons me at will
to scale every wall, face every fear
To surrender all of my guilt
Forever the tide of my heart has been changed
never to be the same
Forevermore I will look to the past
As the beginning of now the end
I'm not the one I once was known
I'm no longer a girl inside
I'm as different now as the morning sun
is from the evening tide
Yet I'll rejoice in what I now know
And hold it close to my heart
As a part of me that was pushed aside
To make room for a brand new start
The knowledge of something so raw and so true
Is rare to say the least
The memory continues to hold in it's hand
The heart that belonged to me
I'll never regret one second of time
I allowed myself to know
There was more to me than what used to be
A secret I'll forever hold.