Alice Finally Hits Pay Dirt

What the Alice in Wonderland movie (or book for that matter) didn't tell you, was when Alice fell down the rabbit hole, she was so dazed by the fall, that it completely messed up her workout routine. While she was running around talking to crazy rabbits and having tea with the Mad Hatter, she was also packing on some serious butt fat.  No, that was no petticoat under her apron dress, that was all her :-) Yeah, it's not exactly Hollywood movie material, but trust me, that's exactly how it went down. If you have no idea what I'm talking about you can go here

http://tbirecovery4sp.blogspot.com

or just exit and close. Either way makes me no never mind.

I've had the almost flu all week. I never really felt like I was going to die, so I'm pretty sure it wasn't the true flu, but still, I've felt pretty lousy. Tonight when I got home I was laying on the bed talking with my husband. Well, I was pretending to listen while my mind went running down 100 different rabbit trails because that's what people with ADHD do. But, to his credit he probably thought I was listening to him, cause he's just adorable like that.  When there was enough of a pause in the conversation that it wouldn't be awkward and totally obvious that I wasn't listening in the first place I jumped up from the bed and headed out of the room....  "Where you going?"  I told him I was just going to dig through the closet underneath the stairs and take a look in my skinny clothes tote. When I came back into the room with an armload of clothes he shook his head and said.... "Boy women are so different than men."  Well, duh! That's what makes life so fun. Think about it for a second. If the earth was full of nothing but men... How boring would that be. Women add spice and high heels to life, but that's just my opinion.  I thought he was referring to the fact that most women have a skinny side of the closet, a fat side of the closet and then somewhere in between side of the closet.... Because yes, things flucuate with us, can I get a witness. No, that wasn't what he was talking about, he just thought it was weird that I could be so sick and then come home and want to try on clothes. Well let's be honest, it's only because I was going down in the size of clothing I was trying on, had it been the opposite, I would have been sicker than a dog and wouldn't be trying on anything.  It's just one of those women things that men could never wrap their minds around in a billion years and exactly why we make things so interesting. So he watches me try on an armload of clothes (with much interest I might add), and to his utter joy (because the evening would not have gone well if nothing had fit), all of my old clothes fit.  No, I am no super model, never will be, but thank you Jesus I can finally pack the fat side of my closet into  totes and tuck them under the stairs.  Now I won't have to go buy all new clothes.... But come to think of it,  I still need to replace those jeans the EMT guys cut off of me and I do have a wedding to go to. Maybe a little shopping but certainly not a whole wardrobe :-)

The One

I've had a wonderfully busy weekend. It was full of college graduation events with my future Daughter-in-law, her family and friends. As I sat in the audience of graduation it was hard to hold back tears. I've noticed through the years that whomever my children love, be it a girlfriend, boyfriend, friend, teacher or boss, I seem to
get swept up in their affection and love them as well. I think that's just a Mom thing where you can't help but love those who pour into your child in a positive way. Later at a party with their friends, I looked around at all the beautiful people (that would make a great title to a song). My son has a great (and big) group of beautiful friends. Across the room I watched a table full of them as they laughed, joked and hugged. In the back yard my son sat with others and strummed his guitar as they sang. The street out front was lined with cars which

really isn't out of the norm even on a non-party night. The tiny house was busting at the seams as parents and friends celebrated endings and new beginnings. There were a lot of special people who have graced his life over the last few years, but across the crowed room... There was the one.

Consider Yourself a Success

Growing up my favorite game was playing dolls. Not Barbie dolls, not paper dolls, but baby dolls. I remember telling my mom I never wanted to grow up because I never wanted to get too old to play dolls. I would dress my pet rabbit, Thumperlina, in doll clothes and stroll her around the house in a stroller. When we realized Thumperlina had unnecessary parts in her nether regions, we shortened her name to Thumper and I continued to dress him in doll clothes, effectively making him the first cross dressing rabbit I know.  That was before things like cross dressing rabbits were even important enough to be political fodder, so even at a young age I was a trend setter. A lot of little girls dream of being doctors, lawyers or designers, I only dreamed of being a mom. My bedtime prayer went like this...

"Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord soul to take. And please Lord don't do the rapture thing before I have a chance to have a baby and watch it grow."

It's true, I prayed that a lot when I was young, I was so afraid Christ would return before I could become a mom. A friend of mine told me this weekend that she wasn't sure if it was a good thing, or a bad thing that now her kids were grown and in college, neither one of them wanted to come back home and live with her. That is the ultimate gold medal in motherhood. Giving your children wings and courage enough to embark upon their own adventures leaving you behind to do nothing but simply glow in the pride of who they have become. To all the moms who have accomplished this great feat, the happiest of Mother's Day to you! Job well done faithful one, consider yourself a success.

Occasionally

Spring is springing all around which means every day is one day closer to the June wedding we are anticipating. The mailman delivered the invitation this week. When I came in from work, it was lying on the
 dining
room table. I practically had to pinch myself to believe I was staring at an invitation to my Son's wedding. Barefoot and tussled haired is how I still see him in my mind. The days fly by, the seasons change and you have to embrace each day and every season that God has blessed you with. There were days I doubted, but the day has come when I now know that yes... He will wear shoes... Occasionally.

But obviously not today

Let's Hear it for the Girls

This weekend was the personal shower for my future daughter-in-law. It was a well planned event for a bride who's goal is to be as unplanned and spontaneous as possible... because that's just how these kids roll. They pulled back the veil to her inner circle and I got a glimpse of the female version of "The Haaj". They were every bit as fun loving and hysterical to sit and watch as my son's friends, except with less belching, scratching and other noises that can be heard any time manly men gather (although there we a couple of snorts I believe).

The setting was beautiful, perfect party house with a tri-level back yard which sits on the edge of a lake. 

The games include doing pantomimes of wedding things

Guess who brought the panties 

A video of my son being asked questions. For every question the bride had to guess the answer and get a piece of bubble gum for every answer given.

Every personal shower needs a lap dance or two

Of course what personal shower is complete without the bride being made to model her new sexy stuff for her friends as she tries desperately to keep from dying from embarrassment. It was an absolutely adorable day spent with a lot of adorable women who are coming into their own, picking up the mantel of tradition and carrying it on with their own funky style. I loved it!!!!

Bubble Wrap for the Heart

We had a wedding shower a few weeks ago for my son and his soon to be bride. I was talking to someone about their selections and was asked... "What the heck were they thinking when they put bubble wrap as one of their selections at Walmart?" Hmm, I hated to tell them that it was one of my son's favorite play toys. Who doesn't like popping the bubbles on bubble wrap? I think I responded with they would be moving so it would come in handy. Actually there are a lot of times bubble wrap seems like an appropriate tool to have handy. A friend of mine posted the following quote by C.S. Lewis....

"Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and probably broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully around with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket--safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.....The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell."

Who hasn't had their heart broken by life? When life breaks my heart my initial instinct is to crawl to my hidie hole and never come out. The urge to insulate myself by removing all risk, all relationships and all possibilities of failure seems like a great alternative to being broken and betrayed by my own behavior and the behavior of others... Or simply to wrap my heart in bubble wrap so it will bobble and bounce with the blows. When I sent my  little ones to kindergarten for the first time, I came home feeling like I had released them to the lions. How I wanted to keep them safe and sound in our quiet little den, surrounded only with positive influences, healthy instruction, and unconditional love. In fact even today, as my last teenager leaves the house, I'd like to throw a lasso around him and drag him back into my arms, because I know the world can be a very cruel place and eventually he will get his heart, his spirit, and his pride broken. Short of holding him captive forever, the best I can do is wrap him in a bubble wrap of constant prayer and trust that my God is bigger than the lions of this world. If you look closely at the brokenness of a heart, the nicks and bruises suffered through life, create a tapestry of beauty that is painted from the pain each has suffered and the obstacles each has overcome.
Prayer is the bubble wrap for the heart.

Does this Swimsuit Make My Butt Look Big?

"Does this swimsuit make my butt look big?"

You know I don't think I've ever asked that question when I was at my ideal weight. Only when I know I've gained a few unanswered pounds or skipped one too many workouts will I ask something I already have the answer to. I asked it the other day when I was browsing on my lunch hour. I came out of the dressing room and asked the shop girl (We were the only two in the store) if my thighs were too big to wear what I was trying on. I could tell she wanted to crawl under a rack, but she was honest with me and It was a win, win situation for both of us. She sold me a shirt instead, and I'm not walking around in big butted pants.

Romans 8:38
All things work together for good to them that love God, to them what are called according to his purpose.

It's funny how that little verse doesn't say anything about all things being easy to swallow, or tons o' fun to experience.
I sometimes neglect to recognize "all things" can be used in very constructive ways and "all things" aren't some cosmic conspiracy to make me go off the deep end. I can choose to use "all things"  to improve a situation or to understand a situation better,just like I can choose to go on a diet and shave a few inches off my butt, or just buy bigger pants. It's all about choices and whether I want to walk around in a delusional world wishing things aren't as they are and imagining them the way I want them to be... Or, I can take the facts and develop a plan that turns things from a negative into a positive. Sometimes it seems like turning a negative into a positive is against all odds, but against all odds, God can, does and will do great things. From the ashes of shame and conflict he is able to paint a beautiful picture of love and grace if only we will allow him access to our ashes and trust the brush in his hand. It's time to make a choice.