Showing posts with label Dave Ramsey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dave Ramsey. Show all posts

Friday, November 8, 2013

Retail Therapy Hell


Shopping isn't bad for everyone, shopping is bad for me. I've used shopping as a recreational drug for years. If I'm happy, I celebrate with shopping. If I'm sad, I comfort myself with shopping. If I'm depressed, I self-medicate with shopping. If I'm hurt, angry or bored, shopping is what the doctor orders to cure my ills. It is 100% an addiction that releases happy endorphins in my tinnie tiny minuscule brain. My husband's new year resolution was to rehabilitate my spending habits, so once again he drags out the ole' Dave Ramsey envelopes and instructed me to use them. He's tried this before and I failed the test miserably. It's not that I can't do the Dave Ramsey thingie.... It's that I don't want to do the Dave Ramsey envelope thingie because it makes it even more apparent that I spend too much which is a fact I'm already well aware of so why the need for a reminder of something I already know?!! In order to see to it that this attempt wasn't a total failure. . .  He took away all my credit cards, including my super secret credit card that I didn't think he knew about. I told you it was an addiction!!! When you start hiding your credit cards like a drunk hides their whiskey, Sister you may have a problem. His confiscation left me with no choice but to stop shopping cold turkey. I am now the shopping equivalent of a tee-totaller and it's starting to take a toll. I have been very proud of myself, especially over the summer. The mailman and I have an understanding. . . . Since he also delivers to where my husband works, we have an agreement that he doesn't mention the deliveries he makes (or used to make) to me. Every day when he drops off the mail,   I take the stack (STACK) of catalogs I receive and without even looking through them, I put them in the shred box. It's been June since I've been shopping, and that includes online. The season is changing, the new fall catalogs are arriving and if I had a sponsor like they do in AA, mine would be a busy little bee keeping up with my urge to splurge calls. I've assembled a nice little stack of catalogs showing the new fall fashions. Try as I may, I can't bring myself to shred them yet. It's like an itch that I can't scratch or a twitch that could quickly turn into a twerk. Epiphany!!
Maybe that's what is wrong with Miley Cyrus. Maybe she's in Retail Therapy Rehab too. That would totally explain her public twerking!!!!! Anywhoo, the other day I just couldn't stand it any more. On my lunch hour I did something I haven't done in months. I went on the hunt for something to scratch the twitching itch. After going into a couple of stores, I went into the drug store and made a score, a splurge of grand proportions. Immediately I got the "I just bought something pretty on a whim" high. You know you are officially in Retail Therapy Hell, when a $2.00 bottle of nail polish sends you to your happy place.I

Monday, October 25, 2010

GROUNDHOG DAY AT AFFAIR OF THE HEART



Twice a year a craft/exhibit show called "Affair of the Heart" comes to a nearby city. My girlfriends and I love to make it an outing but the last few years we've had a hard time getting our schedules together to be able to do so. This year one of my girlfriends asked if I could go.I realized I was taking a chance at another huge crowd event, but you gotta face your demons.
We've both had a lot going on and to be honest we haven't talked much all year, so I was looking forward to getting some one on one time with her and about a billion other women. The ooh-ing and the awe-ing is at an all time high at these things. Massive amounts of women of all ages and a few tortured husbands, who look like they are being dragged through estrogen hell, attend. The booths are "all things girlie", crafts galore, it's just an overwhelming amount of stuff. There are 7..... count them 7 buildings packed like sardines with mostly girl stuff! It's a total sensory overload!!!! First and foremost, we must find and partake in the strawberry crepe booth. I think there is actually a city ordinance about this requirement. My crepe had to have "extra pudding", cause I like things the way I like them.  When the sugar rush was in full swing... Let the shopping begin. Immediately I break the ice by purchasing 2 braclets that I could simply not continue my life without. Shallow? Yes, no doubt but that's just the way I roll. My personal gauge of whether or not you're having a good time is basically related to how many packages you are carrying.

We were both having a good time and our purses where beginning to weigh heavy on our shoulders. When we got to the middle of what I think was our 4th building, we turned a corner only to find ourselves on the same isle as we had just left. We doubled back and found an isle that looked new and fresh.... In fact I think we both bought bell necklaces on this isle before we realized that we had been down the isle before and never even seen the bell necklace booth. That's really not unusual considering how many people and booths there are, so we forged ahead. Then we realized that every other isle was an isle that we had seen before. We were in the middle of the building so I knew we hadn't been down all the isles.  We continued to double back searching, searching, searching for the isle that was after the isle before the one we were on now (exactly!! That's exactly how we felt. Say what?). We were very confused, it was like we were in some kind of science fiction continuum and stuck in girl stuff heaven with no way out. We couldn't figure out if we were just coming off the sugar high from the crepes (if so we needed more crepes), or if our Alzheimer's had conveniently picked this time, this place to simultaneously strike both of us.... Or on a more sinister note, it was some cruel Dave Ramsey punishment for throwing caution and budgeting envelopes to the wind.  Whatever the cause it was imperative that we find the exit and get our bearings. When we finally got out of  building from hell.... I think we were both pretty much done. Our feet hurt, our backs ached and we both felt.... Well, less than what we used to be. I told my friend we may have to start taking her teenage daughter with us just to lead us around so we wouldn't get lost. Better yet, we could invent a "An Affair of the Heart" GPS that would keep people like us on track. Little did we know that the building from hell opened up to the parking lot maze from hell. Seriously, seriously, are we being filmed by a hidden camera or something? Geeze-freakin-Whiz!!!! I thought we would never find the car! "Dear God" I prayed under my breath.... "Please do not let that be an example of things to come." We made it back home in one piece (well two pieces since there were two of us). I humbly came into the house with my head hung in shame. I asked my husband if he loved me. When he said yes, I asked if he could put an actual dollar amount to that love because he wasn't going to be happy when the credit card bill came next month. He wrapped me in his arms, like he always does, and told me what was done was done and he hoped I felt better (I hadn't had a good couple of days). Actually I felt a lot better I informed him. When I've had a bad day or I'm depressed, buying things soothes me... It's my drug of choice and yes I recognize that's not a good thing and will seriously work on it. I think that being transported into An "Affair of the Heart" that read like "Groundhog Day" totally reformed this shopoholic. At least untill February when the next one comes to town.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Patience Is a Virtue


Patience is a virtue, and something I don't presently have much of. I got home from work today and found a DSW shoes rewards coupon in the mail. My first instinct was to head out to the City (1.5 hours away), and buy a new pair of shoes..... Then I remembered A) My family expected me to fix dinner tonight B) The stupid "Dave Ramsey" envelope budget thingy C) If I got held up in the City shopping and couldn't make it back to work tomorrow my boss  SO wouldn't understand. Then I realized.... God must be trying to teach me patience and I'm think to myself "After 47 years.... Why bother?" I remember when my daughter was a wee one, scooting around the house in her walker (my gosh I don't even think those things are legal any more).  One of my vows of motherhood was that I would never put my nic nacs away. My kids were just going to learn that there were some things they could not touch.  My daughter would scoot up to a little pretty knowing she was not suppose to touch. She would sweetly look at me as she reached her hand toward the "no no".  In my sweetest mommy voice I would say..... "No, no. Don't touch" and she would quickly draw her hand back. Seconds later her sweet little arms would once again extend to the "no no" and she would glance at me and back to the "no no" again. Those little fingers would ever so slowly arch toward the "no no" and as they did her chubby little fingers would stretch as far apart as they could and she would wiggle each one in turn as each little finger longed just for one touch of the forbidden "no no". Isn't that just like us all. Whatever is just out of our reach or "forbidden" is exactly what we are craving at that second. Do I need new shoes? Ha!!! You have got to be kidding me.  I could wear a different pair of shoes every day for probably several months and still not run out. Still, that coupon is burning a hole in the pocket of my purse. I don't need shoes, but I want them so very badly. I hung my head and proceeded to the kitchen with coupon in hand. What should I fix for dinner? Then I see it!!!! The expiration date on the coupon isn't until November 14th!! That gives me almost a month to siphon money from one "Dave Ramsey probably knows best" budget envelope to my very own "Dave Ramsey doesn't know EVERYTHING" budget envelope. I have time to... ummm, Budget new shoes!!!! Yes in fact I believe the Lord may be trying to teach me something..... I'm not sure I've totally learned it yet, but I have accepted the fact that he is trying to teach me something. They say every journey begins with the first step and I plan to start my journey in cute shoes. You know... Sometime next month. For those of you who are wondering.... All 3 of my kidsn (for the most part)  never crossed the nic nac boundaries I put in place for them. Today those sweet little fingers sail the ocean blue and have occasionally been wrapped around a N240 machine gun as they protect our freedoms. So yes, eventually the lessons are learned and after the fact they are a sweet memory of life's journey.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Let The Budget Begin

$$$$$$

After being the official "Bill Payer" at our house for 20 some odd years, I decided to turn the reigns over to my husband. We've been married now for almost 29 years. There have been times.... Very short periods of time, where we attempted to do the bills together. Let's just say that we decided that we would live longer and happier if we didn't do that any more and yours truly somehow ended up with it. I remember the day "I Quit" like it was yesterday. I worried and juggled and still nothing came out with us on the winning end, so I gathered all of the bills, all of our check stubs and all of my ledger stuff in one big arm full and headed up the stairs. My husband lay on the bed reading a book as I dumped the load of bills (I really want to use another word there but won't since this is a family friendly blog)on the bed and in the sweetest tone I could muster up told him..... "I'm not doing this any more!" It was one of those rare moments where he just had to take one look at my face and he instinctively knew.... "Just don't ask any questions, remain calm and give her whatever it is she is asking for." I had big crocodile tears rolling down my cheeks and I was in a full fledged meltdown. He sweetly said he would be happy to do it from now on, I turned around, walked down the stairs and went along my merry little way. From that point forward every Monday has been his hell day. Every Monday I would come home for lunch to find him hunkered over the breakfast table with the bills and checks laid out neatly in rows on the table. He didn't talk about it and I didn't ask. Truly I felt like I had paid my dues and it didn't bother me a bit to watch him pay his. I know that sounds harsh, but that's how I felt. So last month he read a Dave Ramsey book and a couple of weeks ago informed me that "We are going on a budget." I think I was turning the bed down as he began to tell me how The Budget would work (I thought I'd wait and hear him out before I turned his side of the bed down since I wasn't so sure he'd be sleeping in it that night). He explained there would be an envelope for different things (such as hair care and stuff) and if there was any money left in each envelope at the end of the month it didn't carry over (like my roll-over cell phone minutes) but it went directly into the savings. My response was A)My hair care and shoe and shopping envelope needs to be LEGAL size, not some little note card size envelope. B)Since he only needed two pairs of shoes,hence I should be allotted a portion of his shoe allowance. C)Who the heck doesn't allow roll-overs? Some months my hair needs a little care, some months my hair may need a lot of care and I'm just thinking this whole envelope budget thing should pertain mainly to low maintenance gendered people such as males. He ever so gently assured me that.... and these are his exact words...."This is going to be fun!" I kid you not, those words actually came out of his mouth. He made the mistake of telling me we had to wait and start it at the beginning of September. Yes!!! Sunday the 29th of August, was my all day shopping trip to the City! With cash in hand (because we are starting out debt free and will no longer use credit cards, LOL), I hit every store I could Sunday. Bought clothes for the fat side of the closet, the skinny side of the closet and the transitional side of the closet. I am now officially ready for the fun to begin!!! Bring it on.