Creepy Dolls @ Affair of the Heart

What a great time I had Saturday with my family! Saturday my husband and I went to the City to meet up with our kids; sadly our youngest had to stay behind to work. When we got to the City we split up, boys left to do boy things, like look at wood, girls went to do girl things like ooh and awe over blingy stuff at Affair of the Heart. I love going to Affair of the Heart because it's just so girlie. It looks like someone just vomited glitter and rhinestone on anything that could possibly be glued, stapled or blasted with sparkles. There are 7 building full of blinged out anything you can imagine, all in high definition. It can be a little overwhelming, even to those who don't suffer from sensory overload. Toward the 6th building you could tell that the three of us were winding down. As we were walking out of one of the buildings we saw a woman with two babies in her arms. They were the real looking babies. I saw a news program about 40 something women getting these life like dolls and pretending they are real newborns to the point of changing the diapers on a regular basis and putting them in a stroller when they go shopping. I told the girls, that would be me if I didn't get grandchildren soon. My daughter said she would start looking for a home to put me in. In the next building we were standing looking at the hair on the wall... Seriously when you're really tired and are seeing dots because you've looked at too much bling for one day you just have a tendency to stop and stare trying to

comprehend what the heck this booth represents... or at least we did. It was a hair piece booth with a wall of hair, which at that point in the day if you stared at it long enough was kind of creepy. Then I saw two dolls at sitting at the end of the booth on a shelf. They were those real life dolls. I picked the dolls up and insisted on the girls holding them because their bodies are filled with sand or something and they feel so real. The owner of the booth had kind of wondered over and was listening to us when my daughter said... "They are so creepy!" The lady stepped up behind her, jerked the doll out of her arms, cradled it in her arms and replied... "They are not creepy! I looked at my daughter and told her that she had totally just offended the lady. The lady said... "Yes I am offended. I make them myself, I hand paint them and each and every hair on their head is put there by me with a pin. I even painted little veins on her hands." I just couldn't help myself... "Eww, that makes it even more creepy." to which the crazy baby lady had to agree... "Yea, it kind of does." We stepped away from the life like creepy dolls as she soothed their hurt feelers and wrapped them back in their baby blankets. Yea, we didn't make friends with anyone at that booth, she was a little sensitive. As we were wrapping up the last building, trying to maneuver though a land mine of strollers with very upset real life babies who weren't creepy at all, one of them pointed a gun right at me as an explosion of bubbles blasted me in the face... "Oh!!! That is so cool" I told the kid, then I asked the mom where she got it. We went to the bubble gun booth and I told the lady I wanted a bubble gun, in fact just give us three! She wanted to know how old the kids we were buying them were, I looked at her totally hurt and offended and informed her we were buying them for ourselves. She seemed a little shocked, although I'm not sure why bubble blowing adults would be shocking, but she determined we were age appropriate and let us buy three bubble guns with laser lights... When we felt like we couldn't take one step more, we called the guys and had them come pick us up. We told them our creepy baby stories, shot them with bubbles and then went to fix dinner. They wanted to know what we had bought besides three bubble guns. We told them we got ponytail holders that you have to have an engineering technical degree to use, a dog bone place mat for Aja's messy cat, a electric cord cover and Kathleen bought a dress. We made out like bandits. It was a wonderful day and not just in a creepy doll kind of way.

GROUNDHOG DAY AT AFFAIR OF THE HEART

Twice a year a craft/exhibit show called "Affair of the Heart" comes to a nearby city. My girlfriends and I love to make it an outing but the last few years we've had a hard time getting our schedules together to be able to do so. This year one of my girlfriends asked if I could go.I realized I was taking a chance at another huge crowd event, but you gotta face your demons.
We've both had a lot going on and to be honest we haven't talked much all year, so I was looking forward to getting some one on one time with her and about a billion other women. The ooh-ing and the awe-ing is at an all time high at these things. Massive amounts of women of all ages and a few tortured husbands, who look like they are being dragged through estrogen hell, attend. The booths are "all things girlie", crafts galore, it's just an overwhelming amount of stuff. There are 7..... count them 7 buildings packed like sardines with mostly girl stuff! It's a total sensory overload!!!! First and foremost, we must find and partake in the strawberry crepe booth. I think there is actually a city ordinance about this requirement. My crepe had to have "extra pudding", cause I like things the way I like them.  When the sugar rush was in full swing... Let the shopping begin. Immediately I break the ice by purchasing 2 braclets that I could simply not continue my life without. Shallow? Yes, no doubt but that's just the way I roll. My personal gauge of whether or not you're having a good time is basically related to how many packages you are carrying.

We were both having a good time and our purses where beginning to weigh heavy on our shoulders. When we got to the middle of what I think was our 4th building, we turned a corner only to find ourselves on the same isle as we had just left. We doubled back and found an isle that looked new and fresh.... In fact I think we both bought bell necklaces on this isle before we realized that we had been down the isle before and never even seen the bell necklace booth. That's really not unusual considering how many people and booths there are, so we forged ahead. Then we realized that every other isle was an isle that we had seen before. We were in the middle of the building so I knew we hadn't been down all the isles.  We continued to double back searching, searching, searching for the isle that was after the isle before the one we were on now (exactly!! That's exactly how we felt. Say what?). We were very confused, it was like we were in some kind of science fiction continuum and stuck in girl stuff heaven with no way out. We couldn't figure out if we were just coming off the sugar high from the crepes (if so we needed more crepes), or if our Alzheimer's had conveniently picked this time, this place to simultaneously strike both of us.... Or on a more sinister note, it was some cruel Dave Ramsey punishment for throwing caution and budgeting envelopes to the wind.  Whatever the cause it was imperative that we find the exit and get our bearings. When we finally got out of  building from hell.... I think we were both pretty much done. Our feet hurt, our backs ached and we both felt.... Well, less than what we used to be. I told my friend we may have to start taking her teenage daughter with us just to lead us around so we wouldn't get lost. Better yet, we could invent a "An Affair of the Heart" GPS that would keep people like us on track. Little did we know that the building from hell opened up to the parking lot maze from hell. Seriously, seriously, are we being filmed by a hidden camera or something? Geeze-freakin-Whiz!!!! I thought we would never find the car! "Dear God" I prayed under my breath.... "Please do not let that be an example of things to come." We made it back home in one piece (well two pieces since there were two of us). I humbly came into the house with my head hung in shame. I asked my husband if he loved me. When he said yes, I asked if he could put an actual dollar amount to that love because he wasn't going to be happy when the credit card bill came next month. He wrapped me in his arms, like he always does, and told me what was done was done and he hoped I felt better (I hadn't had a good couple of days). Actually I felt a lot better I informed him. When I've had a bad day or I'm depressed, buying things soothes me... It's my drug of choice and yes I recognize that's not a good thing and will seriously work on it. I think that being transported into An "Affair of the Heart" that read like "Groundhog Day" totally reformed this shopoholic. At least untill February when the next one comes to town.