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Sunday, December 15, 2013

Excuse Me but Your Poinsettia's Been Hacked

Beautiful as always
My office door opened the other day and as my co-worker walked through, she immediately began sizing up my Poinsettia.  "Hey, don't be giving my poinsettias the stink eye." I warned, then we both laughed. Yesterday, not even a week since I had been given possession of the dang thing, I noticed it was looking a little sad. Dang it! I had gone so far to come into the office over the weekend and moved it away from the window afraid the cold would be too much. As we ended, break I noticed it was downright sick looking. I hadn't even had it a week for heaven's sake! I picked it up and carried it back to my co-workers office with whom I am in the running for the least green thumb. The other girls in the office were hot on my heels. I walked in holding my sad little plant and asked where hers was.  With a sly grin she refused to offer its location swore she had not done anything that was against the rules. I knew it! I just
Looking for pity perhaps
knew it, she had hidden it until she found a suitable replacement!  She assured us that wasn't the case and then mentioned it was in a better place. Had it already passed on to the great beyond? No, it was in ICU being cared for by another co-worker who is more poinsettias friendly and who reported it was already perking up. So now I guess we're just adopting our pitiful plants out to be maintained by someone else until all but one spot on the wall of shame has been filled? Foul, I'm calling foul.  Meanwhile another co-worker was putting out feelers for someone to give her plant some TCL while she took a long weekend off. I'm sorry sister but this is every gal for herself and by saying that I'm actually doing her a favor. Trust me, she does not want me babysitting her plant! It's amazing my three children made
No pity or mercy, you've been hacked
it to adulthood under my care. She placed her surprisingly healthy plant on a file cabinet in the hall with a pity note laying a foundation of failure should she come back to work to nothing but a tiny stalk with shriveled leaves scattered all around. Photographic evidence shows her note was hacked shortly after she left for her weekend. Hmmm. Friday we had the company Christmas party during lunch since the actual event got iced out. We were sitting shoulder to shoulder enjoying the opportunity to visit with some we don't come in contact with every day. My boss (the great giver) asked a co-worker sitting across from us if she had been in our department lately. Initially she looked puzzled, because she rarely has a need to come to our department, but I knew EXACTLY where this conversation was going.... "Oh don't you even get started on that I snapped!" She went from looking puzzled to sheer shock. She looked at me like my just split into, revealing the Jackie on the other side.
Needs something besides ICU
He shrugged his shoulders and tried to act benign then muttered something about if she had seen the lovely poinsettias. By this time, several people were tuned into the exchange as I explained the horror we face each Christmas. He shrugged his shoulders again and tried to defend himself by saying he thought it was a nice gesture... "It's not nice! It's a sadistic ritual that you take a lot of delight in." When I looked across the table at the shocked faces staring back at me, I decided to drop it because obviously there are some who just don't get "our" departments sense of humor. So here are the standings so far. Girl #1's poinsettia looks like it just stepped off a poinsettia runway. Girl #2 poinsettia looks much the same in
Could be worse, could look like the one  in ICU
spite of taking a long weekend. Girl #4 poinsettia actually looks worse than mine in spite of being in ICU and my poinsettia looks sad and droopy. I'm not sure the last two are going to make it to Christmas.

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